The employee room at work is actually a bathroom converted to a storage closet for bleach, cloth napkins, speakers, and our stuff. It's accessible only to employees and with a key , which we keep in a special place and share among ourselves. Long ago I stopped keeping cash in my wallet when I would stow my bag in the closet. Though when I first started, I kept a lot of cash in my wallet, unattended, mostly because I would forget to take the money out the night before at home after a shift, but also because I trusted all of my coworkers. I really liked my new job and everyone. I knew it was a bit naive, and after a few months when I discovered that 30 dollars went missing from my bag, I stopped keeping cash in it.

From time to time I would think about how stupid it is to keep my Metro Card in my wallet as well, but for some reason I sometimes, sort of, test situations. I've been aware of it for a few years and  cannot account for why I decide to do things, aware of potential, undesirable consequences. The best answer I can come up with is that, in the end, I don't believe the outcome will ever be bad. Does it make sense? I think to myself, If I leave my Metro Card in my wallet, an employee could easily take it. BUT he probably won't. And I go with the latter, trusting that everything will be okay, but knowing it's wiser to be more cautious. 

Anyway, you can probably guess where this is going. Last night at the end of my shift, I grabbed my bag from the employee room, took little notice of the fact that my wallet was sitting upside down at the bottom, stuffed my tips in it, and hurried for the train, tired and uninterested in being kept at work any longer, especially since we didn't make much last night. It was at the train stop at W215, my breath steaming before me from the chilly night air and my cold fingers fumbling, that I pulled out my wallet for my Metro Card. When I opened it, all I found in the usual spot was my driver's license, which I always keep tucked behind my Metro Card in the same sleeve. My heart instantly dropped to my stomach as I feared the worst. I rifled hurriedly through my entire wallet, panicked because I was pressed for time. 

Chagrined at not immediately finding it, I was compelled to temporarily abandon the search in anticipation of an approaching train. I went to the machine and very reluctantly fed it $2.25 for a single-ride ticket. I slid through the turnstile and pushed through the doors to the platform, taking a seat to conduct a more thorough search of my wallet. Why did I purchase only a single-ride ticket instead of one that would last me a week or two weeks? Because just two nights ago, two nights ago, I bought one for $45, which actually has a $50 value. I had exactly $45 left on the card when it was taken from me. It was the same as having cash stolen. That card would've lasted me about two weeks. And there's no way to be reimbursed if it's been purchased with cash, obviously. 

When I first moved here Rilkean sent me an email, telling me that if you buy a Metro Card with an ATM card and it gets lost or stolen, you can call a number and have it cancelled, and the remaining value is returned to your ATM card. It's sort of a long process, but it does work, as I discovered when I lost my card last summer. Lost that time, not stolen. I know that for sure. 

After having scoured my bag for that card and not finding it, panic gave way to upset, and on the train I found my mind racing, quickly assembling a list of my coworkers that evening. I feel I can safely eliminate a couple of people, but for the rest, I have no idea. I don't want to look on anyone with suspicion because I honestly have no clue who did it. But I can still feel very pissed off by it. Because I said goodbye to every one of them last night and they each said good night back with equal good humor. And whoever took my card had to see my sunny face on my license, smiling up at them as they stole from me (It's true: My expression in the picture is pretty bright, which is unusual for me). And there's no way to figure out who did it or even place a camera in the room because it's a bathroom, and that's weird.

It's so easy for people to rummage through others' things in that room. They get to lock themselves in there, for crying out loud. At my last job, we had to cram our stuff in this greasy cabinet, but at least it was in plain view. It was in a short hall lined with tables, one we had to pass through countless times throughout the day, so it was impossible for someone to go through another's bag without all employees, and patrons too, for that matter, witnessing everything.

Sigh.

Of course Brian has offered to drive me to work even more right now. Very sweet. And guess what? At the end of tonight's shift, as I was sweeping the mezzanine, I happened upon a Metro Card lying on the floor. I figured it was discarded, but picked it up anyway, just to see if maybe it had something left on it. On the way to the train stop I was eager to try it out at the turnstile, but assumed what was likely: that the stile would blink insufficient fare in its digital green readout and I would have to toss the found card. However, when I pulled it out and passed it through the slot, it worked. It had two rides left on it. Awesome! That made me feel better. And a little lucky, actually.