She Thinks Outside the Box

So a couple weeks ago I was wandering through Greenwich Village on my day off as I am wont to do, although this particular day I was applying for jobs. Times is tough and a girl like me gotta make the endz. Anyway, I was walking into every eatery/restaurant I happened upon because first: every spot in the village is fantastic, basically, and second: because I can't be choosy in these uncertain times. I'll take what is handed to me, even a fancy schmancy restaurant. I'll find a way to work it. So every place I drop in I put on my best smile, ask if they're hiring servers. "Oh you're not? Well may I leave a resume anyway?" And after awhile I think to myself, Man, I must have copied a lot of resumes. They're really lasting, and I've handed out a bunch today. Then a scary thought suddenly occurs to me, and I reluctantly open my bag and pull out my cute Hello Kitty folder. Yep. Crap. I've been giving out my old resumes from my days of applying for editorial jobs and internships over the summer.

How long I was making this mistake I have no idea. I know that I started with a handful of the right resumes: Objection: to obtain a position in the food service industry that implements qualities X, Y, and Z, etc etc. I think I handed out one, maybe two of the other resume: Objection: to obtain an editorial position in the magazine publishing field that expands upon X, Y, Z. Realizing my stupid mistake, and having run out of resumes, I bent my steps towards W10th to drown my troubles in a couple of amazing cupcakes.

Back home I related this little error to Jenny, who found it really funny. Then we started joking about it. "Yeah," I said. "Maybe they looked at my resume and said to themselves, 'Hmmmm... an editor in a restaurant... never thought of it before... hmmmm.... maybe this girl's on to something... I like her. She thinks outside the box. Kathy! Yeah Kathy! Call up this... Dorothy... and find out when she's available for a little face time... hmmm... work editing at a restaurant....' "

Wouldn't it be great if they thought I was suggesting something novel to them, something that hadn't occurred to them before? You know what you guys need-- an editor, I would be asserting as I handed them my resume. Maybe from now on when I run out of waitress resumes (nyc=waitress resumes!) I can just start handing out the other ones, intentionally. "Hi! I was wondering if you had any positions open for editor? You don't have any editors here? Well, we'll have to fix that." And then I hand them my polished resume. "An... editor... in... a... restaurant. Huh! A thing like that!"